Post by Masaharu Tanabashi on Jan 24, 2011 6:48:52 GMT -5
I just watched this 1992 cyberpunk action movie titled Nemesis. This movie was hilariously bad to the point where I had to hit rewind a few times (I have DVR so this is possible even when not watching a DVD) just to be sure I saw what I actually saw.
Don't get me wrong though, I believe there is a difference between bad and shit. Shit movies are those with no entertainment value to me. I don't have any intention of even watching them and people who recommend these movies to me repeatedly will find themselves watching Eraserhead "Clockwork Orange" style in a completely dark room when I become the overlord of the universe.
Bad movies on the other hand are movies that are clearly not good even if you lowered the standard for good severely but at the same time they still are entertaining. Basically, how movies rank in my mind is based on entertainment value. I love the mental stimulation of a great entertaining movie. It can be funny, scary, action packed, and so on but it must be entertaining. Nemesis definitely fits in the "bad movies" category.
The movie is essentially about a cyborg cop that gets brutally shot to pieces in duty (with enough ammunition to supply a small army (including exploding shotgun shells)) and starts to question his humanity when his would be murderer says he's more machine than human. Months later after being fully rebuilt and retiring from the police force (and refusing an offer from his boss to return), he get's shot down again. This time he wakes up to find his former police force has fixed him again but this time added a bomb that will detonate if he doesn't take one last assignment. That assignment is to kill his former boss who has went from the police officer side of things to the terrorist side of things. I don't want to spoil the movie too much but here is what I feel stands out about this movie.
1. As I mentioned before, insane amounts of ammunition being used including exploding shotgun shells and guns that must be 3 feet long and require a special harness to use, and the ability to blast an outline of your general body shape in walls and floors and just plow right through them. I thought the opening scene was crazy with how the guy gets shot to all hell but then there is the "terrorist cyborg" that gives him access to his former boss. Two guys enter the hotel room she is in using the just blast a general outline of yourself in the wall and plow through method and one of them using the 3 foot long gun. She does take out the guys but she also gets shot enough times be on par with Alex Murphy from Robocop. Then another guy comes in and shoots her to pieces even more. Only when she is shot in the head does she die and this is after her legs are gone, and at least 20 bullet holes in her shirt.
2. The main character and a bad guy going down a carnival slide that is covered in mud. I shit you not, one scene he's covered in mud, then he seems half way decent in the next. With more bad guys after him, it's not like he has a chance to stop for a blast of water from a garden hose or something. He does end up diving into water several times but that only makes his previously mud covered shirt harder to keep on with each subsequent dive into water.
3. The amount of characters that have male names if they are female (Max, Jared), and female names if they are male (Michelle, Angie). The most hilarious of this goes to the character of Michelle. Remember that scary fucker that John Claude Van Damme had to fight at the end of Cyborg? That guy = Michelle. It doesn't help that the main character could be considered a poor man's JCVD either.
4.Two hilarious (or at least hilarious to me) kills in the movie: One guy gets blasted with machine gun fire in the back and one round hits him in the ass. I nearly choked when I instantly thought "what a pain in the ass this guy is". The other being a guy getting shot in the nuts and of course with this being a cyborg, fireworks ensued.
5. The moment where I called out "BULLSHIT!" out loud to the TV: When a particular cyborg's endoskeleton popped up to ruin the day even further.
6. Notable actors: Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa (probably best known as Shang Tsung from the first Mortal Kombat movie), Brion James & Tim Thomerson (IMDB these last two. If you have not seen any of their movies, there is something wrong with you.)
Don't get me wrong though, I believe there is a difference between bad and shit. Shit movies are those with no entertainment value to me. I don't have any intention of even watching them and people who recommend these movies to me repeatedly will find themselves watching Eraserhead "Clockwork Orange" style in a completely dark room when I become the overlord of the universe.
Bad movies on the other hand are movies that are clearly not good even if you lowered the standard for good severely but at the same time they still are entertaining. Basically, how movies rank in my mind is based on entertainment value. I love the mental stimulation of a great entertaining movie. It can be funny, scary, action packed, and so on but it must be entertaining. Nemesis definitely fits in the "bad movies" category.
The movie is essentially about a cyborg cop that gets brutally shot to pieces in duty (with enough ammunition to supply a small army (including exploding shotgun shells)) and starts to question his humanity when his would be murderer says he's more machine than human. Months later after being fully rebuilt and retiring from the police force (and refusing an offer from his boss to return), he get's shot down again. This time he wakes up to find his former police force has fixed him again but this time added a bomb that will detonate if he doesn't take one last assignment. That assignment is to kill his former boss who has went from the police officer side of things to the terrorist side of things. I don't want to spoil the movie too much but here is what I feel stands out about this movie.
1. As I mentioned before, insane amounts of ammunition being used including exploding shotgun shells and guns that must be 3 feet long and require a special harness to use, and the ability to blast an outline of your general body shape in walls and floors and just plow right through them. I thought the opening scene was crazy with how the guy gets shot to all hell but then there is the "terrorist cyborg" that gives him access to his former boss. Two guys enter the hotel room she is in using the just blast a general outline of yourself in the wall and plow through method and one of them using the 3 foot long gun. She does take out the guys but she also gets shot enough times be on par with Alex Murphy from Robocop. Then another guy comes in and shoots her to pieces even more. Only when she is shot in the head does she die and this is after her legs are gone, and at least 20 bullet holes in her shirt.
2. The main character and a bad guy going down a carnival slide that is covered in mud. I shit you not, one scene he's covered in mud, then he seems half way decent in the next. With more bad guys after him, it's not like he has a chance to stop for a blast of water from a garden hose or something. He does end up diving into water several times but that only makes his previously mud covered shirt harder to keep on with each subsequent dive into water.
3. The amount of characters that have male names if they are female (Max, Jared), and female names if they are male (Michelle, Angie). The most hilarious of this goes to the character of Michelle. Remember that scary fucker that John Claude Van Damme had to fight at the end of Cyborg? That guy = Michelle. It doesn't help that the main character could be considered a poor man's JCVD either.
4.Two hilarious (or at least hilarious to me) kills in the movie: One guy gets blasted with machine gun fire in the back and one round hits him in the ass. I nearly choked when I instantly thought "what a pain in the ass this guy is". The other being a guy getting shot in the nuts and of course with this being a cyborg, fireworks ensued.
5. The moment where I called out "BULLSHIT!" out loud to the TV: When a particular cyborg's endoskeleton popped up to ruin the day even further.
6. Notable actors: Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa (probably best known as Shang Tsung from the first Mortal Kombat movie), Brion James & Tim Thomerson (IMDB these last two. If you have not seen any of their movies, there is something wrong with you.)
