Post by dylancage on Jan 12, 2011 20:33:57 GMT -5
The Caper Event Center is Casper, Wyoming is filled to capacity for the 61st edition of PWE Solitary. This is much more impressive before you consider the fact that: A. The Casper Event Center is not exactly Madison Square Garden; B. There isn't much else to do on a Wednesday night (or any other night of the week in Casper).
This hasn't stopped Professional Wrestling Evolution from pulling out all the stops to put on a great show with a card that is absolutey stacked from top to bottom with surprises and superstars.
Regardless of its small size PWE has not given the Casper Events Center the 'midwestern house show treatment.' The ring is surrounded on three sides by fans in steel chairs and the stadium style seating is equally packed. The ramp leading to the ring has been shortened to fit inside the smaller venue but the massive Evo*tron is still at the top and looks even more massive in the middle of Wyoming.
And on the massive screen there is a massive door and on the massive door in smaller (but still massive) letters there is a name. This name is bigger than the screen, the door, and the entire state of Wyoming. When it comes to professional wrestling this name is the biggest name in the country, on the continent, and in the entire hemisphere. This isn't just the biggest name in the world, the solar system or the galaxy. This name is the biggest name...in the Universe.
DYLAN CAGE.
There is a high pitched screech over the PA system and then the opening guitar riff of Say Anything's 'Little Girls.'
Dylan Cage is the only superstar in PWE and in the entire Universe whose entrance has its own entrance. The massive locker room door swings open and the brightest star in the PWE sky steps in front of the camera. The biggest star in the Universe is in Casper, Wyoming.
All 5'10, 190 lbs. of him. Sometimes big things come in small (or completely average) packages.
Cage smirks that famous smirk and looks down the hall to the left...the right...and back to the left again. He chooses to go left and the camera chooses to follow. Cage is dressed to wrestle in purple briefs and matching kickpads over neon green boots. At the end of the hallway he takes another left and-
"Mr. Cage! Mr. Cage!"
By the time the camera rounds the corner Bob Catholic has already stepped in front of Dylan Cage and Dylan Cage is already pushing past PWE's intrepid interviewer and heading to gorilla position.
"Mr. Cage! Dylan! I thought you were-"
Like a record with the needle pulled away or an iPod with its headphones suddenly yanked out the music stops. Cage spins on his heel and glares at (or straight through) Bob Catholic. Catholic's satisfaction in gaining the State Penn winner's attention is quickly replaced by visible, quaking fear.
"Thought I was...what?"
Like a deer in the proverbial headlights, Bob Catholic freezes. He begins to stutter. He begins to stammer. Fortunately, mercifully, Cage saves him.
"Thought I was...PWE Superstar of the Year?"
WHO?!
The fans in Casper may be living in a cultural backwater (even by Earth standards) but they have cable. They've seen this show before. They know what to do.
"Thought I was...the biggest draw this company...has ever seen?"
WHO?!
Don't give them too much credit. It's only one syllable.
"Thought I was...the longest reigning Gateway Champion?"
WHO?!
"The greatest...champion in PWE History?"
WHO?!
"I don't care what you THOUGHT. You KNOW exactly who I am...primate. And I'm here to add 'Road 2 Glory' winner to that list."
With that parting shot Cage turns his back on Bob Catholic and takes two more uninterrupted steps toward his destination: gorilla position.
Those two steps are all he gets before Bob Catholic gathers all of the courage he can and says exactly what is on his mind.
"I...W-w-we thought you were retired!"
Cage keeps walking.
"You can ask Randolph about that."
Catholic nods his head thoughtfully, then panic crosses his face.
"But he's not here tonight!!!"
Cage turns back toward Catholic and the camera and smirks.
"I guess Casper probably is too metropolitan for his...simple, sapien tastes."
FTB
This hasn't stopped Professional Wrestling Evolution from pulling out all the stops to put on a great show with a card that is absolutey stacked from top to bottom with surprises and superstars.
Regardless of its small size PWE has not given the Casper Events Center the 'midwestern house show treatment.' The ring is surrounded on three sides by fans in steel chairs and the stadium style seating is equally packed. The ramp leading to the ring has been shortened to fit inside the smaller venue but the massive Evo*tron is still at the top and looks even more massive in the middle of Wyoming.
And on the massive screen there is a massive door and on the massive door in smaller (but still massive) letters there is a name. This name is bigger than the screen, the door, and the entire state of Wyoming. When it comes to professional wrestling this name is the biggest name in the country, on the continent, and in the entire hemisphere. This isn't just the biggest name in the world, the solar system or the galaxy. This name is the biggest name...in the Universe.
DYLAN CAGE.
There is a high pitched screech over the PA system and then the opening guitar riff of Say Anything's 'Little Girls.'
Dylan Cage is the only superstar in PWE and in the entire Universe whose entrance has its own entrance. The massive locker room door swings open and the brightest star in the PWE sky steps in front of the camera. The biggest star in the Universe is in Casper, Wyoming.
All 5'10, 190 lbs. of him. Sometimes big things come in small (or completely average) packages.
Cage smirks that famous smirk and looks down the hall to the left...the right...and back to the left again. He chooses to go left and the camera chooses to follow. Cage is dressed to wrestle in purple briefs and matching kickpads over neon green boots. At the end of the hallway he takes another left and-
"Mr. Cage! Mr. Cage!"
By the time the camera rounds the corner Bob Catholic has already stepped in front of Dylan Cage and Dylan Cage is already pushing past PWE's intrepid interviewer and heading to gorilla position.
"Mr. Cage! Dylan! I thought you were-"
Like a record with the needle pulled away or an iPod with its headphones suddenly yanked out the music stops. Cage spins on his heel and glares at (or straight through) Bob Catholic. Catholic's satisfaction in gaining the State Penn winner's attention is quickly replaced by visible, quaking fear.
"Thought I was...what?"
Like a deer in the proverbial headlights, Bob Catholic freezes. He begins to stutter. He begins to stammer. Fortunately, mercifully, Cage saves him.
"Thought I was...PWE Superstar of the Year?"
WHO?!
The fans in Casper may be living in a cultural backwater (even by Earth standards) but they have cable. They've seen this show before. They know what to do.
"Thought I was...the biggest draw this company...has ever seen?"
WHO?!
Don't give them too much credit. It's only one syllable.
"Thought I was...the longest reigning Gateway Champion?"
WHO?!
"The greatest...champion in PWE History?"
WHO?!
"I don't care what you THOUGHT. You KNOW exactly who I am...primate. And I'm here to add 'Road 2 Glory' winner to that list."
With that parting shot Cage turns his back on Bob Catholic and takes two more uninterrupted steps toward his destination: gorilla position.
Those two steps are all he gets before Bob Catholic gathers all of the courage he can and says exactly what is on his mind.
"I...W-w-we thought you were retired!"
Cage keeps walking.
"You can ask Randolph about that."
Catholic nods his head thoughtfully, then panic crosses his face.
"But he's not here tonight!!!"
Cage turns back toward Catholic and the camera and smirks.
"I guess Casper probably is too metropolitan for his...simple, sapien tastes."
FTB